Unspoken or unclear expectations are silent killers

I once took a big gulp from what I thought was a cup of coffee a colleague had made for me. The tea that filled my mouth was the strangest thing my tastebuds had ever encountered.

What was this strange tasting tea? It was ordinary black tea! A completely normal Ceylon. I’d had this exact tea a thousand times before. I actually quite liked this tea.

So why then did I want to spit it out with all my might? Because I was expecting coffee. I wasn’t tasting the tea, I was tasting THE DIFFERENCE between the tea and the coffee. Take my word for it, this was a uniquely weird and unpleasant experience.

Our people team at work spent some time with managers yesterday talking about performance management. One thing that stood out for me is how important regular feedback and clear expectations are.

Unmet expectations are killer. And unclear or unspoken expectations are silent killers that we as leaders cannot afford to allow free reign within our teams.

The next time you get a strange reaction when giving someone constructive criticism, take a moment to ask yourself why.

They might not be reacting to the feedback itself but to THE DIFFERENCE between what they thought your expectations were and what they are now discovering it actually is.